Dear precious one-
Your daddy’s gone and I have stayed up WAY too late because I like to have the solitude. I just cant bring myself to go to bed.
But you (Vange ) came traipsing in while I was watching different music videos on youtube. After seeing the worlds women that they hold up high for inspection and examples of beauty. I can’t help but be startled by how you surpass them all. Your beautiful tan skin and naturally curly hair isn’t what stops me. Nor is it that you radiate natural beauty without gobs of make up and shimmering skin tight clothes, course your not even 3 yet.
But its your innocense, your wonder, your simple desires that take me by surpsrise. My heart feels stabbed with the realization that some day these 3 might end. Some day you might find your self caught up in the same question that haunts the rest of the worlds women.
AM I LOVELY? AM I WORTH IT?
And you might try many things to find the answer. But none will fulfil you. Some may even defile you, shame you, give you a certain reputation. But only one can answer your question in a way that you stop looking because you believe, you are satisfied. And it’s my job to point you in that direction.
Am I doing that? How do I do it?
How do I teach you to love your body, skin, and frame enough to be comfortable in it but not need to show it off?
How do I show you that loving yourself means respecting yourself, drawing boundaries, acting honorable, not compromising?
How can I communicate that nothing will carry you from hill to valley in life like the knowledge of God and his word hidden in your heart?
How will you come to value this more than sparkly things and shiny lip stick?
Will you learn that a women who stands up for the helpless and impoverished is is more respected than any DIVA on mtv?
Or that the Human soul is not meant to be worshipped but to worship only one?
How I can pass down the ability for you to fight for what is good and not pass down a legacy of anger?
Where is the boundary between enjoying beautiful things and needing them?
Will you learn to discipline and sharpen your mind and tongue as much as you do your body?
What will you grow to desire? what will you grow to seek out?
For now it is my love.
“mommy I need cuddles”
while up in my lap you pull back and ask
“sing me a song?”
“what song sweetie?”
So I sing sweet words of truth to your little hungry ears, and you drift off to sleep.
Darkness covers all the land. Sounds of day are gone. Love is all around you now.Will be till the dawn. Stars shine on the windowsill. Moon shines through the trees.Angles by your bed tonight, shine where no one sees. There’s no need to be afraid.All the whole night through. God has made a promise child. He’ll take care of you.All that you’ve been dreaming of await you when you rise. So with the peace that Jesus brings, close your sleepy eyes.”
and you do.